New Gay Whore-to-Culture App

by Nicholas Krempasky

I’m a fat chaser
I’m a ball baster
I like masc jocks into WS
I’m DDF looking for Same
I’m a latin bottom bitch looking to
Have my hole filled by older white daddy
Papi’s to the front of the line.
Happily partnered but not dead
Open to anything
Come over now
No one over 25 please…

From crass and to the point to the ltr
Looking for same these boys have one thing in common
They are the new electronic gay-whore-to-culture
But don’t worry, there’s an app for that!

It doesn’t stop there… these pseudo “social” sites allowing gay guys (sorry ladies, your market doesn’t have the dollar impact yet apparently) to hook up indiscriminately (or as picky as hell given the tags) has seen wave after wave of new-gay come onto the scene… think pre-stonewall parties with instant access to pants (I know, not much different) but also access to complete digital livelihoods. I miss the cryptic glances and the swarthy stares from across the room… I can still get those looking younger than my near 3O (read as “almost dead”) years, but only from even older men in bars themed in ways interior decorators these days would call antique thrashed sheik or in beer pub relics of even older beer pub relics from the UK to old school dives with innuendos for names… I may miss the more exhilarating glances and the possibilities of free drinks, but I certainly appreciate the doorbell ringing and escorting my evening’s entertainment, who btw I don’t plan on remembering his name, in doing a cordial meet and greet using no words and after festivities, sending him on his way all while wearing my PJs (except when it is “socially excepted” that they be otherwise strewn about my floor).